Pierre Leduc, coach at Morgan Philips Talent Consulting in Canada, shares with us a case study on leadership and the approach used to find the right balance between empathy and assertiveness.
In my coaching practice, I support two business leaders who are facing specific challenges related to empathy in their leadership. These cases illustrate two extremes of the use of empathy in the workplace and highlight the importance of balanced leadership.
Empathy, like emotional intelligence, has long been considered an essential component of effective management . In recent years, its use has increased in discussions about leadership . Many studies have highlighted the beneficial impact of empathic management on employee engagement, interpersonal relationships, stress management, and talent retention.
Furthermore, we are entitled to wonder, as Pénélope Cordello, associate professor at the Université des affaires de Montréal, raises, whether the notion of ” empathetic leadership is not a fad or even an empty term used to mask an unhealthy culture. It is a bit of a cover-up because we have never talked so much about empathy at the same time as we have never heard so much about toxic management and harassment at work. “Believese that leadership is a subtle mix of technical and psychological skills, varying from one context and from one person to another. Empathy is certainly part of it, but contrary to what many say, it is not the first quality of the leader today.
Case 1 Overflowing empathy that hinders decision-making
My client embodies deeply empathetic leadership. She has deep compassion for her colleagues. She can put herself in other people’s shoes to perceive and, to a certain extent, teel and share their emotions. This is a remarkable quality that allows her to understand others and adjust her behavior accordingly.
However, she is also too sympathetic to the other. She comes to seek to offer her support to the other, avoid confronting, and avoid harming or hurting her.
Consequences :
- Lack of assertiveness.
- Decisions delayed or avoided.
- Maintaining situations that are harmful to the team and the organization.
- Partial abdication of his leadership role.
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Exploring the consequences of hesitation
- For oneself and the person(s) concerned
- For the rest of the team
- For the organization as a whole
Back to the basics of leadership and how they apply to her
- Skill: having a clear vision of the objectives.
- Courage: making decisions, even difficult ones.
- Trust: Being authentic and consistent.
Understanding your role in the organization
- Its challenges
- His priorities
- Its risks
Case 2 A lack of empathy that weakens commitment
Conversely, my client seems incapable, he says so himself, of demonstrating empathy. According to him, his main role is rather to set objectives, provide resources, and ensure follow-up and adjustments. He recognizes that leadership consists of influencing,mobilizing, ng and motivating his team, but he does not see the interest as the desire to share the emotions of others to achieve this.
Consequences
- Awkward or ineffective communications.
- Distrust and disengagement from the team.
- Lower productivity and unpopular decisions.
Yet empathy is innate. To varying degrees, we all feel for our friends and teammates and share feelings when they are suffering or in danger.
Coaching Approach
Thinking about the concept of empathy
- Why empathy is important
- Why do we feel empathy for some people and less for others?
Exploring avenues for developing empathy
- Active listening and validation of emotions.
- Express gratitude and acknowledge your own emotions.
- Put yourself in other people’s shoes to better understand their perspectives.
Fostering humility and self-reflection
- Encourage constructive questioning and demonstrate humility.
Conclusion Towards balanced leadership
Empathetic leadership is not about accepting everything or ignoring other people’s emotions. It is about a delicate balance between empathy and assertiveness.
- An assertive leader knows how to set boundaries, delegate, andd make firm decisions.
- An empathetic leader creates an environment where everyone feels valued and understood.
The challenge is to master these two dimensions to develop an approach that is both human and effective. The starting point remains self-knowledge and a deep understanding of human dynamics.
